Enduring Optimist + Blossoming Cynic (ft. Sasha)

If you haven’t noticed, most of my artwork lately has reflected my general isolation and existentialism. I miss my sister, my stress fractures in my lower half of my body have been painful, and lately I’m constantly wondering if I’ll be able to make my financial obligations.

Not for lack of taste, cheap red wine haplessly adorns my shelf, my fridge is empty, and my head is full of memories, and “should’ve, would’ve, could’ve,” scenarios.

I thought by the time I was 26, things would be different. I mean, is this it? Am I just going to struggle forever?

I’m not sure what’s worse; the fact that things aren’t moving, or that deep down I fear they never will. I was once the proud enduring optimist, but I see myself becoming a blossoming cynic, and that frightens me.

Shot on : Pentax K1000
Film : Cinestill 50d rated at 64